Inside my letter to Melania: I am so sorry

In the midst of all the Trump bashing, the person that draws my sympathy the most is Melania.

Trump Inauguration
Melania Trump – 45th first lady of the United States, walks into her husband’s inauguration, looking charming in baby blue.

I mean look at the poor girl. Yes she’s charming but this wasn’t part of the bargain. She was content just being married to this rich guy and having enough to take care of her lifestyle and son. She knew well how to massage his ego and had completely acculturated to the Donald Trump lifestyle and person. And then he lands her here.

In the very shoes of her distant idol. How is it that you ask me to replace an iconic, very celebrated and almost flawless woman? She was nearly perfect all round – education, check; parenting, check; humour, check; grace, check; compassion, check – what positive boxes does she not check?! She rapped, danced, exercised, loved dogs and gave badass speeches even extempo! How do you measure up to an Ivy league lawyer??!!!

There are two things Donald can do for Melania, if he is not too busy learning to be Mr President seeing that he’s been Mr CEO all his life.

  1. Give her a great team and
  2. Respect and adore her like or almost like Barrack did Michelle.

When I say a great team, I do not mean the ones that helped her choose ‘cyber-bullying’ as a ‘project topic’ when Donald was busy naming and shaming people for being different on Twitter and during his campaign.

By a good team, I mean the ones who would look in her background and find her something to be genuinely passionate about. She speaks five languages; let it count.

A bunch of people who can help her find her strength and emphasize it. It’s easier to comment on and cultivate what one is truly passionate about. The truth is that right now people do not care whether she planned to be FLOTUS or not. In fairness, there are no requirements for this position, you just have to be married to the president. But because of predecessors like Michelle, the bar is so high in terms of what is now expected of a first lady.

Back to my point, Melania dropped out of school in her first year to pursue modelling as a career. Now, a good team can make a project and campaign from that part of her past. She already dresses well and has good poise and comportment it would seem but we are yet to see her under pressure. For every time she opens her mouth in public space now, she is going to have to sound bright. Don’t make fashion statements only.

Take this as a challenge to develop yourself, Melania. Surprise yourself. Surprise Donald. Read and read and read. Ask questions. Don’t ask Donald. Befriend Ivanka (if you aren’t friends already); she seems to have a good head on her shoulders. And if this is not too much for you, befriend Michelle. Reach out to her. Ask her how she did it. You have more to gain. I bet she can be discreet if you ask her to. The press doesn’t have to know. Yes, Donald will not approve. But this is about how bad you want this. You may have to stand up to him for once.

Barrack was conspicuously the wind beneath Michelle’s wings. Yes, she has the best education the world can offer and was (very likely still is) smarter than Barrack in class yet it was he who gave her the room and confidence to be such an amazing first lady. The whole world knows you do not have that kind of support system. Your man wouldn’t  even pretend to be a gentleman in full public glare. And considering that being president is a new role for him, I expect he’d be very focused and overtly selfish about making that mark every president before him didn’t. In other words, don’t count on him.

Whatever you do become Melania, just don’t be that trophy wife. I wish you the very best. You can succeed.



A fan and wife



About Nomoreloss: It’s too late!

Muyiwa Osinuga aka Nomoreloss

Sincerely I didn’t know this many people knew Nomoreloss. I mean, look at even me writing about him. But I just had to. Somebody needs to talk to us. We can’t keep doing this to ourselves. This thing called social media will be the death of many.

So you have his contact on your BBm and in your mind, you’re friends – he’s your padi… C’mmon it doesn’t matter…even if we don’t talk for a year, whenever we get to it’s just seamless…That’s the delusion. That’s how we kill ourselves.

Then the person dies and suddenly he’s your siamese twin. At that report, you remember 15 years ago, when he introduced you to the marketer or CEO who gave you the first major gig that began your career. But he had to die for your memory to be jugged. Right? We can’t keep doing this.

Yes, Nomoreloss was sick. But it was more psychological than physical. He had been admitted sometime in January and discharged. In his final weeks, he was ill again, this time not from Typhoid. He was sick of us – me and you, sick of all the 16 hundred thousand followers and contacts that his computer and phone said he had with none caring enough for him. He was tired of hearing and knowing how immensely rounded and talented he is with the uniqueness holding only promises all his twenty plus years of pushing. Se promises la ma je ni? Promises don’t pay the bill. What good is a blank post-dated cheque whose date never comes?  What happens in the present?

Muyiwa pushed and toiled. He was baba nla hustler. Yes his marriage was very short-lived, so? He dust himself up, grateful for the chance of being a father, he moved on. His long time ‘Lere friend needed a kidney surgery, he rallied financial support. But no matter what he did, he couldn’t earn the life he wanted – the life he deserved. He could have balanced a bread tray and walked into a Madonna shoot and we still wouldn’t have noticed. No matter what he did, we gave him the crumbs – airtime, bottom right corner of Page 51, invite him to watch rather than be watched, he just always seemed forgotten. He could have been a veteran Harrysong if he only he commercialised his song writing for this younger generation. But Muyiwa can’t write nothings. His ‘stuff’ was his pride. Seeing we all seemed done with him, he lost the will to live on.

I remember the day of his last video shoot. I got to the office that morning last year and saw the buses filled with crew and equipment about departing for the seaside location. Business was slow already and I couldn’t process what good partnering with a Nomoreloss could bring. But he was the boss’ personal friend and Ayeesha Music was no stranger too. Here we are today, that same video is now being referred as his last done visual. I wish I could truly rejoice for this Beautiful thing. I just hope that we truly learn. God keep his daughter, comfort his family and teach us to love truly.